It was just one of those days where I didn’t know if I was going to be feeling really, really good or if I was going to jump off the edge into the abyss. It was a very mixed feeling. It was a very awkward feeling. It was powerful and it was painful. It’s like standing next to a big fire in the pouring rain - you’re not sure what’s going to happen. Are you warm or are you soaking wet?
I’m giving you a little background and a prequel.I’m setting up the story for my piece called Warrior.
I knew something good was coming, I could feel it that night. What I’m gonna tell you about this piece, well he was for somebody I loved. This piece was an inspiration like a whisper from God. I don’t paint for friends,I don’t do commission work. I paint what God puts in my head but I also believe God has people in my life for me to meet and help. And this piece was for one of those guys.
His name is Cordell C.
I’m saying this because I always want people to know how much I appreciate them and how much I love them. Cordell is one of those people. He doesn’t realize how much he affects my painting, my style and my well-being I cannot say enough good about Cordell.
He’s one of my people. He is somebody I deeply dearly love. I surround myself with good people. I don’t put anybody into my circle without a reason and believe me it is not for a season it is for a lifetime if you ride with me.
What amazes me about Cordell is I don’t know how he does it; he’s one of the few people that can get into my mind and he understands what I do sometimes better than I understand it myself.
Believe me you don’t wanna be in my head. There is a lot going on constantly. The one thing that calms me down is painting and before I paint I pray. After a good night of painting I’ll make myself some tacos, maybe I’ll vacuum my floor, maybe I’ll watch a episode of Bigfoot.
Anyway I just got done doing a painting and I showed it to Cordell. We’re talking because I truly value his opinion and he’s so freaking good at it. He told me exactly what I painted without me telling him. For that alone I love Cordell from the bottom of my heart. He is amazing and I would do anything for him.
But I have an amazing group of guys who have been with me from the beginning of this journey. I’ll introduce you to them because I paint for each and every one of them. If I love you then I paint for you. I am not lukewarm, I’m either all in or I am all out that’s just how I am.
With my guys and with Cordell I am absolutely 100% all in. Anyways, that afternoon we got to talking about my pieces and I was both happy and sad. It was just really good and I knew something big was coming that night.
At 10 o’clock after I said good night to everybody that I say good night to (and you know who you are) I did my pre painting ritual. I did my routine and man I could feel the thunder. I could feel the power. I could feel this warrior coming towards me.
He hit me like a train on the freaking railroad tracks. I just braced myself and here came warrior out of the darkness. Let me tell you what, once warrior comes after you there is no place you could hide in this world or the next. He is so deeply spiritual, he is so deeply faithful, you can’t hide from him. He’s a Warrior. He’s a Spirit. Go on try and run from him, you’ll never get away from him.
He is very quiet. He’s very calm. He’s very methodical. He’s a hunter and if you are his prey then good luck.
Warrior truly is a spirit. He’s not alive and he’s not dead. He’s an entity. He’s a being you cannot kill or wound. You might hurt him but you will not kill him. He’s one of God’s warriors.
You don’t see him but he sees you. Warrior’s that guy that comes to save you when you’re praying and you’re in a really bad spot. Warrior is that man. Don’t think that all angels are in a diaper with a bow and arrow and come on Valentine’s Day. That is far from the truth.
When you look at Warrior see the scars on his face. Look at those eyes. He doesn’t have a nose but it doesn’t matter because he’s alive and fierce. What I love about Warrior is that we stood on common ground and we looked at each other. He’s always doing one thing; he’s always sizing you up.
Warrior absolutely rubbed off onto me. I have that spirit. I like looking at warrior because I remember painting him. He just stood there proud like he doesn’t care. Look at his crazy hair. Look at that face. Look at those eyes.
You don’t know whether to shoot him or feed him. I think I’d feed him first, he’s always hungry. I think if you feed him and were nice to him and showed him love and respect you would have a friend for life. Something tells me he’s probably like one of those kind of mean stray dogs that you don’t know whether to pat or kick. You’re not sure what he’s gonna do. And I say that in a very very good way. It’s out of respect for warrior. But if you feed him, give him a place to sleep, and you show him some love he’s not gonna leave you. He will protect you till he dies.
Respect is a big thing to warrior. Look at that face. Though he’s gone through some serious battles and I know he’s fallen down many times when you look at that face you know didn’t he didn’t give up. He’s gonna make it. His spirit and his faith said get up and keep moving, don’t lay there because when you lay there you die.
And you are not dead until God calls you home.
Look at warrior. Take on his spirit. Take on that toughness. Take on that grit. Take on that ferociousness. Live the warrior life.
And here’s a thing. I get it if you’re struggling and you’re just not doing well. If you’re kind of wondering “does anybody even care about me” the answer is yes.
See the guy in this picture. Look at those eyes and at that face. He is the guy that is getting you through your hardest days. You are not alone so stop thinking you are. It’s a disgusting thought, please get that out of your head. You are is loved. You are protected. You are needed. You are well. God created you to be happy.
And that is a Warrior.
Believe me what I’m telling you. I had this conversation with warrior. Believe me I need a warrior in my life just as much as you. So many times I couldn’t even count. Warrior has fought for me and then he came to me and then I painted him: I was thinking how did I get here. I did not get here by myself. I got here because God got me here. God sent me men like warrior to fight for me when I couldn’t even fight for myself. When I was down and beaten, warrior protected me. He whispered to me, “Come on get up you can do this I’m right there with you and I did I got back up.”
So when you are having a bad day don’t let that one bad day make you feel like you have a jacked up life because you don’t. It’s just a damn bad day. Let it go and move on. But again when you have that day and when you think you can’t make it and nothing is going right and everything is going wrong and your life is crumbling around you, please look at this painting.
Look at Warrior. Know he is there with you and if you’re not strong enough he’s got the strength for you. He is YOUR Warrior.